Some of the Things I Should Have Told You ("final")

I always try to say what I think
so I live with no regrets
soon I'll be moving from here to there
and I don't want to leave you feeling empty.

You knew how to open my mind,
read it like a novel, write in your
own beginnings and endings.
Without a doubt you were my muse.
Being able to thank you left me at ease.

Looking back though I think I forgot
to tell you a few things about myself,
most of all I should have said
"I love you" its cliché I know
so let me redeem myself.

I should have told you time
does not exist. It's all made up,
just inside your head. And last I checked
man still made the clock.

Should have said beware of man made
creations like god and the devil.
Should have stamped that stuff with
a really long warning label.

I should have told you that I
tend to spew theological bull shit.
Should have warned you that some
of the things I should have said might
have been offensive.

Should have told you to search
for the higher knowledge, instead of
stuffing your head with straw.
You should take that one to heart.

Should have told you such
scarecrows end up in fields
of materialistic and worldly concerns
alone and with out others,
save for those damn birds

Should have told you such
selfish thoughts grow faster
than strawberries but taste like dust
and are worth even less.

Should have told you of the many
Zen idealistic thoughts I had
that rolled through my head
like a love letter in a bottle,
floating in a vast, vast sea.

Should have told you its ok
to look for compassion in others
but first figure out how to
love yourself, its the only person
you'll ever really know

I should have told you all
these things and more
maybe I'll write a book
I can title it "All the things
I should have told you"

I' m going to have to tell you though
that it will probably be a long read,
but even if the phrase has lost all its meaning,
The value of it dried up through repetition;
still the first page will contain only the words...

"I should have said I loved you"

I took out a few things, added some others, what do you folks think?

Work in Progress

something i was working on and i thought I'd share it with you guys.

swimming in and out of your temples periscope
you'll find me mocking those without spiritual sight
just because you have answers doesn't make you right
the twine of your faith can't bind me like rope

like a vulture coming to dine
I pick at your thoughts,
squish them like grapes
and turn 'em into white wine

periodically laying back to set sail
rotating words and commonly used phrases
mix it with paint,
and give that masterpiece some changes


this is a work in progress as of right now.
Feed back is lovely.

V2 Things Can('t) be the Same

I open my eyes to the blinding light
and felt the need to close them
only morning,
and already my distrado was fueled

I felt no relaxation in the shower,
recalling what was said to me
"you can only completely understand yourself"
those words didn't roll off as easily as the water

Anger flowed through me
as easily as the butter went on the toast
though it met less resistance
as it started to spread inside myself

the front door slams closed
the sky isn't blue
the grass isn't green
my distrado only sees in gray

I hate what I can't understand
so by his implanted reasoning
I hated everything
I can't reject the truth

You changed me
for the better I think
I can pick the moment out from the strands of time,
I can't forget something like that

sitting alone you slide next to me
"you look sad, do you want this"
a tray of desert pushed in my direction
I look incredulously at it then you

the first bite was the sweetest
The fat strawberry, ripe with ancient feelings
your giggle as you wipe away
some red juice dripping down my chin

I saw it then in that moment
there as you smiled
your eyes carried an immeasurable sadness
that same look i saw everyday in the mirror

you'll never know how happy I was
when you wanted to spend the day with me
being with you I felt guilty though,
misery loves company

the walk in the park seems so surreal
the evening sun dipping low
your hair reflected in the golden light
made you seem like a spirit passing through

the feel of the cool deep grass
on our backs we created galaxies
we spoke of literature, art, love
and of gods that had long since past

saying our good byes you stood there
averting your eyes I already knew
a white flower reflecting lunar light,
my response to unspoken words

I woke the next day with a purpose
my heart tugging at me
I couldn't be late
I hate hospitals

Giving your name
I run to the room
Ignoring shouts
I couldn't be late

I was late
I stood there in the empty room
sheets folded neatly, everything tidy
my distrado wanted to ruin it

tear the sheets
break the glass
destroy everything
but I stood there

I saw the vase
and a permanent hole was punched
right into my angry heart
lunar light still lingered on the petals

I dropped to my knees
and for the first time in a long time
I cried,
it was all I could do for you



i changed up a few things, it seems better now though, i like it.